Hi everyone, I haven't been to this forum in a while because I started to practice problem solving on my own but lately, there is this one thing that I couldn't seem to figure out. I hope some one here can help me find that answer upon solving my probem.
About 2 years ago, I met a guy that I soon became friends with. We got together very close soon after we met, and our chemistry just went sky high but it also collapsed quickly. What I didn't know about him is that he was far beyond insecure. He had self esteem issues that he was holding up inside. He dated once before but never had a girlfriend up until college he never went out with any girls. When I met him, we were just friends but like I said, we became very close and everyone saw what was coming and they expected us to be a couple. Quite frankly, I liked him a lot back then. I knew he wasn't exactly the "ideal type" for me because his lifestyle was very different and he had a past unlike me. I liked the mystery in him, so I've always wanted to get to know him more, I wanted to explore him. I met all his best friends and childhood friends as soon as we became close, it was moving rather fast for us..in a span of just a few weeks, everyone around him knew about me. I was "his the one girl" and I liked him too, he was handsome and had a good personality to go with his looks. I never thought he was so insecure deep down.
We went through a lot of problems during the times we were starting to get closer. A lot of issues came from his lack of confidence and he was lying to me a lot just to cover up his insecurities.
I was fed up with all the drama with him, so I decided we should stay friends, even though part of me miss him a lot.
Throughout the times that I met him up until today..it is about 2.5 years...almost 3 years. He never dated anyone in between even though so many girls like him and have asked him out, but he remained single and was always there looking after me like a good friend.
So, this past summer I went to Korea and was there for 3 months. Before I left, I met up with this girl, his best friend and she knew so much about me! His best friend said that he talks about me all the time, he tells his best friend about me and stuff. So, she knew who I was before we even met (she knew from him that I was "that girl")....before I left for Korea, his best friend told me, "YOU SHOULD MOVE ON, DON'T WAST YOUR TIME WITH ___, HE DOESN'T LIKE ANY GIRLS OR WNAT A GIRLFRIEND EITHER." I was sad but I was ready to let it go anyways..
When I was in Korea, his facebook status had all these sad romantic quotes/lines about missing someone and memories and love stuff....etc. I figure he was bored or sad about something. But his best friend facebooked me and said that he (that guy) misses me a lot and is very sad since I left for Korea. I FEEL LIKE SHE (HIS BEST FRIEND) WAS DOING ALL THIS FOR ME. He told her to talk to me about this stuff..and when he was ready then she would contact me about the updates on him..wtfff right? They're like screwing with me.
During the time I was in Korea, he changed a lot. His unhealthy lifetsyle before that consisted of smoking, weed, and dropping (at raves), parties..etc all stopped. He changed completely to a different person. He knew what I liked and was looking for in a guy, and he made himself that "ideal guy" for me.
When I came back from Korea last month (I have been back in the states for a month now)...I go to school with him and he's in one of my class. Ever since I avoided him (hoping it could HELP BOTH OF US to move on)..I was wrong, it made him more sad...the tears in his eyes break my heart, so I decided I should just be nice and be the same to him like before I left for Korea. However, he's been equally sad even when I GREET him in a friendly manner, there is this awkward sadness coming from him. He doesn't smile anymore. On his facbook his posted videos of the songs he said he wished the girl he loves would see it and it's all sad love songs. I didn't care thinking it was probably about someone else. The other day I came to his dance practice to see my friends, I saw the necklace I gave him in his car, two of his friends were talking about the necklace and I overheard them saying he kept that necklace for years now and he told them it was from the girl he loved. (I was flattered knowing it was me..but rather I felt confused and slightly uncomfortable).
He's been forward with his feelings lately towards me..but STILL VERY INSECURE it's so obvious. He is still struggling with looking staright at me in the eye without the fear of rejection. His eyes are always evading mine when we talk but when I see them..they're always look like they're filled with tears. He is a complete happy person around his friends and other pl he is fine..but over years of observing him, he seemed saddest around me...but also happiest around me...he'll do anything I ask him, even if it's stupid, he'll do it for me and always appear happy.
It's why I liked him then..but lately that feeling is lesser and lesser.
But I still want him in my life..but I don't know if I should give him a chance..since now he's a changed man. He changed for the better for me..I am touched but I don't know if it's love or appreciation.
I don't know if he loves me as much as he said he is..(problem is he still seems very insecure so I don't know if I should risk being with him..we might have repeating problems like before).
Also, before when I see pictures of him tagged on facebook partying with other girls I get sad..BUT now when I see those pictures, I don't feel anything..I just look at it like I would with anyone else's pics.
so confuse.....what should I do readers??